It’s funny… I’m a pup who regularly reflects upon what I am grateful for in my life, but I have a hard time accepting generosity from others. Don’t get me wrong — of course I’m appreciative and grateful, but for some reason I’m uncomfortable with others randomly gifting me.
Clearly, I need to shift my thinking. I love to give to others; giving my resources, time, consult, licks and gifts. This comes naturally to me and I assume others will take my offerings with grace and appreciation. And, it feels good to me to give freely of myself.
So why is it shocking and uncomfortable to me when I receive random acts of giving? Clearly, this is writing prompt (in true Judy Stone-Goldman, Reflective Writer, form).
Over the past weeks, I have been surprised by numerous gifts via snail-mail. As I mentioned to you a couple of weeks ago, after my surgery some FOA’s spontaneously and generously sent checks to aid with my medical bills. I was floored by the giving nature of my friends and special bark-outs need to go out to Trish, Grandma, Bill and Karin, among others.
This week mama & I received two boxes from Amazon, and we hadn’t ordered anything. Again, FOA’s (and FOM’s) understood our deepest desires and acted with their giving spirits.
unexpected gifts from friends thru Amazon -- I'm filled with gratitude!
One day this week, we received the DVD of the show Sons of Anarchy, season 3. You see, mama & I started watching this program through our Netflix streaming service (which we since cut), had seen the first two seasons. We had been on a long waiting list to receive the discs for season 3 (again, since we cancelled our service last week, our queue is now moot).
Weeks and weeks ago mama and her old high school chum, Jeff, had been discussing this series as Jeff is a diehard fan too. He insisted we Must see season 3 as soon as possible — well, we already knew that! When we last saw the show baby Abel had been kidnapped and Gemma was on the run — we have been on pins and needles for months!
And then the 4 disc series magically appeared in our mailbox with a gift note from Jeff. Blimey — we didn’t expect a gift of this series! Sure, we had passionately discussed our (mama’s!) love for Jax with Jeff, but never expected Jax and his gang to show up on our doorstep via Amazon!
Then today our mail carrier (whom I love to bark at — it’s stereotypical but I am a dog!) left another Amazon box on our doorstep. This time it held the book “The Ultra Mind Solution”, a nutrition book that mama’s bestie, Brigid, has been evangelizing for months. We saw Brig just two weeks ago and didn’t even discuss the book, yet there it was on the porch.
Receiving support and love through Amazon is seriously underrated! And, I must admit, that I’m a bit mystified about how to react to such caring and love from mama’s decades-old friends.
For me (& mama), it’s easier and more comfortable to give than to receive — why is that? I seriously need to work on this…
I suppose a surprise gift — you know, that unexpected “something” — is even more appreciated by those on the receiving end than a gift for a birthday or holiday — the “expected” gift. Let’s all commit to practicing random acts of giving and immense gratitude when we are receiving these heart-felt, unanticipated acts of generosity.
Dear Atticus,
How true that the tough part of gift giving is being on the receiving end. We like to believe that we are independent, and self sufficient and can take care of ourselves, the reality is that no man (or woman or pup) is an island. We are dependent on others for physical and emotional support and sometimes it is hard to be on the receiving end because we are afraid to be viewed as needy, unprepared, or incapable. I try to remember the joy I feel when I assist a friend or stranger “just because”, so that when the tables are turned and I receive that surprise gift, or unexpected assistance I can accept the gift graciously and help the giver feel that same joy.
Catherine
Although you find it difficult to accept help ~ what you have to understand is that these are just tangible ways of people showing love!
Since we know you find it hard to allow us to help you pay off the medical bills, doing something that will make your life a little easier is the best anyone can do.
Relax and bathe in the warmth of feelings you engender.
Laine D.
“Aspire to Inspire”
http://www.ThoughtsfromABroad.net
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Yep Catherine, you are correct — not dog is an island! lol! and support is Greatly appreciated — just hard to accept sometimes… I’m working through that though. As you said, the tables are turned… xxxooo
I know Laine — gifts are just another form of showing love and I need to accept it as such.
I take your words to heart. You basically summed up my post in just a few short sentences — well done, my friend!!
I must admit…receiving has always been a bit uncomfortable to me too! It is also something I’ve been working on! I truly believe it is something that developed very young in my life…like perhaps yours as well! Why don’t we both just keep working on the Joy of receiving! Because, after all, the “Giver” deserves to feel our joy as well!
I think the greater gift than generosity is gratitude. So happy that you are doing well now.
Atticus, I must say you and Catherine described my feelings about being on the receiving end of generosity perfectly. I too need to work on being less uncomfortable accepting help and not see it as a weakness to do so. I love, love, love to surprise people with gifts (nothing fancy, just little “somethings”) and need to remember others like the feeling giving or helping brings too. So, bring on the gifts. LOL!
Trish
http://www.robertssister.com
caregiving. family. advocacy.
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Atticus, You probably don’t realize how your good will and kind spirit–as well as all that from your Mama as well–affect people. So it is only natural they want to be generous towards you! I only wish I had been one of those taking such initiative–would it seem like copycat to do that now?
Really, Atticus, you’ve had a few hard times this year, and it is fitting that the universe–to which you give your pawsitive perspective so generously–should send back some of that generosity to you now that you need it.
I hope your reflection and writing have been comforting to you. I do appreciate your link to me!
Judy Stone-Goldman
The Reflective Writer
http://www.thereflectivewriter.com/blog/
Personal-Professional Balance Through Writing
Judy Stone-Goldman recently posted..When a Story Leaves Me Trapped in a Sleepless Night
It’s always nice to hear when a “giving” person ends up on the receiving end of things. It’s a wonderful reflection on both you and your mama/
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I think the reason receiving had been uncomfortable to me was because then I felt required to give back. But I learned the joy of receiving when I became a giver.
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